WordGazing: Derby Tip for Grammarians

If you’re still looking for a pony to bet on in today’s Run for the Roses, put your money toward the only one with a connection to punctuation: Comma to the Top. It’s a Southern expression for apostrophe.


I read an uptight blogger’s rant about how ridiculous it is to use a four-word euphemism in place of apostrophe. I don’t know the etymology behind it, but it works—descriptively speaking. And if it helps some folks use a “comma to the top” properly (we already know how many folks can’t master the apostrophe), then what’s to complain about?

Suicide or Murder? A Case Punctuated by Amateurs

I watched a crime drama the other night in which the police declared a woman's death an open-and-shut suicide. But when a private investigator arrived on the scene, he took one look at the suicide note and knew better.

The telltale clue? An errant apostrophe. 

The woman had been an exceptional English teacher and the p.i. knew she wouldn't be caught dead inserting an apostrophe in the possessive its.

That alone didn't solve the case—merely opened it back up. But criminal minds best be warned: Those elementary English lessons do pay off in the real world. Good writing skills are important no matter what your line of work is. And something as small and seemingly meaningless as an apostrophe can lead to justice.